Testing out the "A" word....

Hi sweet boy,
This morning we enjoyed a free breakfast at Chick-fil-a! Yum! (I say "I" because you have an aversion to foods that aren't crunchy)You enjoyed the play/climbing area while I ate. Then I joined you. There was a very nice mom there with her 2 children who were 2 and 4 years old. The 4 year old tried to say hi to you but you just stared at her. The mom and I started talking and we got on the subject of schools (they live in our neighborhood). She asked what pre-school you would be attending. I told her we didn't know yet but that it would be a special needs class. She didn't ask but I went on to explain that you had autism and received lots of therapy. For some reason mommy feels the need to try out that "a" word every once in awhile on a stranger. I don't know why....it just feels different to say it out loud. Not good or bad. Just different.
Last weekend, I was at the grocery store alone (What?????? Unheard of!!) The cashier and I started talking about our children. She asked if we wanted another child. Rather than explain our "tmi" story of how we would be testing all my eggs for Fragile X, then doing ivf....blah, blah, blah....., I simply said that you had some special needs due to autism and that our main focus was currently on all your therapy. It felt really good to say it out loud. Again, I'm not sure why, but it was freeing. :-)As it turns out, the cashiers son was in PT and had gotten fitted for foot and ankle orthotics (like yours!) the week before! It just goes to show you, everybody has a story....
We also received out autism speaks car magnet and it sits proudly on the back of our car along with the "Cure Fragile X" magnet! Mommy and Daddy are very proud to show our support :-)
The other day I had an interesting thought. You had already had a meltdown at Marlee's photo shoot, so we left early. Well daddy was almost ready to be picked up from work so I decided to swing by Target on the way. Now, I know that seems like a horrible idea for a 2 year old who just had a meltdown, but you LOVE Target so I thought I could get away with it. Well, you were mad and head banging the cart the whole time so I rushed right to the checkout. Of course we ended up waiting for what seemed like forever while you struggled, arched your back and slapped mommy across the face. I'm sure the other customers were horrified that I was "allowing" you to do this, but they don't know your story so I just calmly kept repeating, "it's OK, we're almost done..." By the time we left I was sweating and I couldn't feel my left arm from carrying you. Whew! As I got into the driver's seat, for a split second I almost said, "thanks a lot for embarrassing mommy!" but I quickly stopped myself. It is not your fault that I dragged you there after you had already warned me that you had reached the end of your rope by throwing another tantrum just 10 minutes before! That was all mommy's fault! I should have taken your cue and driven straight to Daddy's work. Lesson learned.
On another note- as i was typing this, I got a call from the school system giving all the dates for your preschool evaluation, etc. Yikes! This is really happening, isn't it?!?!
**Cue the anxiety!!**
I love you little man!
Mommy